Chaotic Chaos Parody
by HoorayForCheese
Summary: Worst name ever... This is a PARODY! It is pretty messed up. Percy meets Chaos in a completely random way.
1. The Betraying, of Sorts

**Suuuppp... I've read sooo many stories, and decided to make fun of them! Yay! Anyways... reviews are nice! Anyways... Haters, if you don't like, don't bother to flame! On to the kind -of -story...**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything from PJO.**

* * *

**Chapter 1, The betraying**

**Percy P.O.V**

Hi, I'm Percy Jackson, defeater of Ares, and almost - killer of Gaia. I did totally NOT get knocked unconsious, but everyone is all over my brother for his awesome skills, I mean, I'm awesome, right? Back to my story...

_Flashback:_

_I was walking down to the beach to meet my girlfriend, I was so happy that Athena gave me her permission, with a bit of... persuading. Anywhoo, I was walking down to find my girlfriend, when I saw my idiot brother kissing a girl. I brewed up a wave to splash them, but it went back to the ocean. He went back to sucking face with his date. I looked at the girl closer and froze. I saw blonde hair, familiar grey eyes... _

_"Annabeth?"_

_"No dumbass, I'm Martha, from the Athena cabin."_

_"We're through!"_

_"Ummmm... What?"_

_"I'm sick of your lies!"_

_"Okay..."_

_I threw my sock at her and ran off. As I was running, i bumped into my Wise Girl. _

_"I'm dumping you." Her eyes widened and tears formed. Her lip quivered._

_"W-w-why?"_

_"I cheated on you."_

_"WHAT?"_

_"Why do you think I was gone for three weeks?"_

_"You were on a quest to please Athena..."_

_"Yep, and I definately PLEASED her all right."_

_"That's disgusting. And messed up. AND you've scarred me for life."_

_"Yeah, well, I'm gona kill myself now."_

_"WHAT? WHY?"_

_"I dunno, I'm bored. And feel like it."_

_END FLASHBACK_

And so here I am, plunging Riptide into my heart.

"Percy?"

"Yeah?"

"Why did you stab me?"

"Shit... Sorry Annabeth."

"Well... Fuck. I'm dead."

She slowly collapsed, the life draining from her beautiful grey eyes.

"NOOOOOOOOO!"

I raised Riptide and brought it down.

"Ow."

"Nico?"

"Yep..."

"Shit..."

"How am I tabbing you all?"

"Bro... You're holding the sword upside down."

"Ohh..."

I raised Riptide, the right way up this time, and thrust it into my heart. I slowy collapsed, the blood draining from my body, soaking the grass. Suddenly, fourteen flashes of light shone. The Olymians... have come for me.

"Well, I guess our torches work. Back to the big house!"

* * *

**Thanks for reading! Or... just skipping to the end of the chapter... REVIEW! OR I'LL SET MY DINOSAUR ON YOU! He's purple. And on steroids. Isn't that right dino?**

**Dino: RAAAAWWWRR!**

**Dang... Well, I need a new house now. Review!**


	2. Chaos (So epic he gets a full stop)

**Another chapter now! I'm bored sooo, I'm just writing this in the library at school. Please read! Dino, say the disclaimer**

**Dino: RAAAAWWWRRR!**

**Me: Really dino?**

**Dino: Just kidding; Cheese does not own the PJO characters.**

**Me: What the heck?**

* * *

**Percy P.O.V**

Wow... Death is REALLY boring. My best friend are Hercules and Orion, we are 'The Awesome Trio' and scour the underworld in search of hot girls. I heard the door open behind me and Hercules walked in.

"Hey Perce?"

"Yeah babes?"

"Me and Orion are heading off for another hunt, you wanna come?"

"Sure babes"

"Okay, I'll be off then"

Hercules headed towards the door.

"Babes!" I called

"Yeah babes?" He replied

"Don't I get a kiss before you go?"

"Kay babes"

After Hercules left, I walked to the window to see a pitch black shadow.

Hi, I'm billy, the line break! :):):):) -:D

**Chaos P.O.V**

Watching the universe gets boring after a while, so I flew atound the universe on my intergalactic surfboard until I tried to pull a 360 flip and crashed into the puny god Hades' realm. So here I am, fixing my board in this horrible dump of a planet. I mean, real food? Thats SOOO last century. No physich powers gained from evolution? And they think that I created them FIRST? And that they're my favourite planet? Puh-leaze! Looks like my board is fixed! Finally!

**It's Billy again! Sooo... Still reading huh? :):):):):)•):):):) Spot the cyclops!**

**Third Person P.O.V**

Chaos stood up and was about to leave, but felt a heavy weight attach itself to his leg. He looked down to see a boy with black hair clinging to his leg.

"Get off me boy"

"I don't wanna!"

"Who do you think you are?" Chaos booned, shaking the underworld.

"Percy Jackson, hero of Olympus twice."

"Never heard of you."

"Take me with you!" Percy yelled, still clinging to Chaos' leg.

"No"

"Pleeeaaasseee!"

"No."

"I'll be in your army!"

"...Why would i need an army?"

"Ummm... I dunno."

"No reason for you to come then."

"AWWWWW! PLEEEEAAASSSSSSEEEEEE!"

"No."

"Pretty please with a cherry on top?"

"Hmmm... I do like cherries... Ok, you can come with me."

And that is the story of how Percy met Chaos.

* * *

**FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART****FART**


	3. The end 1

Wassup!** ¡Hola! Bonjour! I had a Russian taster lesson today. :D soooo... I'm bored, just sitting here... Alone... Now I sound phsycopathic. ANYWAY! i'm also doing a greek course! ´οραυφωρχεσζε is my username in greek... I think. Anywayy... Dino, say the disclaimer!**

**Dino: RRRAAAWWWWWRRRRRR!**

**Me: No dino, try again. **

**Dino: Meow!**

**Mr: And again...**

**Dino: Woof? **

**Me: Fine, I don't own PJO**

**Dino: Moo?**

* * *

**400,000,000,000,000 years later. Percy/ El perro bajo P.O.V**

Perro stood and surveyed his surroundings. He had been training vigorously with Chaos as he grew stronger. But, as he watched the barren, broken, desilate area around him, he had only one thought on his mind.

"Chaos! You sent me to the wrong time again!"

**"Whoops, sorry Percy, I was doing your mum."**

"WHATT?"

**"Whoops. Bloody google translate... I was doing your dad."**

"Still not any better..."

**"Your dog?"**

**"Your mission brief! σκατα..."**

_"_How did you get 'I'm doing your mom' from 'I'm doing your mission brief'? And language mister!" **  
**

Chaos smited Percy for his tone. The end.

* * *

**γαμο... Well, thats it! Just kidding, this but one of multiple endings of the story. There will be a LOT of ? Maybe? Possibly? Kinda? I must thank DifferentKindOfAsian for this, as it was your update that reminded me to post. May the cheese be ever in your favour.**


	4. The Chase Thingy

**DI IMMORTALES! I am laughing my butt off. Literally, I think I need surgery... Ok, I was reading and realised that Peeta and Katniss' pairing name was Pennis (which is VERY close to a VERY funny word) I read a story's reviews coz I was SOOOO bored and it said 'OHMYGOSH i love Penis too!' I could not stop laughing, then my sister walked in, read it and her expression was AMAZING! I'm still laughing as I'm typing...**

* * *

**CHAPTER 4**

**El Perro Bajo P.O.V**

I chased the drug dealer down the darkened streets, my cloak billowing in the breeze. I had slowly picked off each of his bodyguards over a five month chase, and now I was close. He turned into a house and I followed, climbing up the side of the building. I entered the room where I heard him quiverig in fear...

The drug dealer turned and shot Percy. Percy died. Meanwhile, Chaos baked some cookies with bananas and fudge. SPACE bananas and fudge. They have more of a zang to them...

THE OTHER END

* * *

**Woah. My A.N is longer than the actual chapter. Awkward...**

**...**

**...**

**...**

**Any funny stories you guys have had on fanfiction? Really bored? I don't care, I have my own problems.**

**...**

**JOKING! Post funny stories in the reviews! JamesSonOfAthena, this does not include you...**


	5. The nearly next part

**Suppp... Okay, I have minir writers block, so I'm working on another story, so hang in there bros, more will come. WARNING! What follows next is a RANT!**

**Okay so, something I hate, I'm sorry, are the 'reading the books' stories on fanfiction. People look at them and go OH MY GOD ITS GOT OVER 100K WORDS! About 200 of them will actually be their's. So authors of those, here's an idea, go write your own fabulam ipsam. And then they post things like:**

**'Ohh... Cliffie. Review or I'll update slower.'**

**Bro. We can just pick up the firetrucking book. But what annoys me the most is when the is a 'reading the lightning thief' one. Bro. WE'VE ALREADY READ IT! WHY ARE YOU POSTING THIS?**

**I don't know if anyone else does this, but if I see a badly spelt summary, I won't read the story. I saw this once:**

**'Percey, Choas. awesome'**

**WHATT?**

**'Hi there. I'm Percey Jackson'**

**'The hero of Olympus?'**

**'Nope. The Aphrodite child who's father was an idiot.'**

**And Choas? Your summary looks like it was written by the minotaur after it's head had been cut off.**

**And another was:**

**'Percy gets lost in the dessert.'**

**Woah. He musta ordered a BIIIGG banana split. What is the plot gonna be? Chocolate sprinkles with tazers? Oh my god that's awesome! Where can I get some of them? It'd be AMAZING for a murder...**

**'So, how'd he die?'**

**'He got electrocuted by a banana split'**

**'Why aren't we stopping this?'**

**'Because it only kills fat people.'**

**Your last words would be 'extra sprinkles.' That is gonna be the way James Bond dies. He's managed to decrease in age twice already. I managed to get the whole thing out without swearing. Well, in English that is.**

**ps. Fabulam means story. You can guess the other.**

**Post in reviews what annoys you or PM me. May the cheese be ever in your favour.**


	6. EXPLODING UNICORNS!

**I am fiiiiiiiinnnnnaaaalllllyyyyy back. HI THERE, I'M YOUR GOD NOW! I demand bacon. FETCH ME MY BACON! And waffles. Waffles are cool.**

**Guess what?**

**...**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**I just wasted your time. :P ON TO THE STORY!**

**Dino: Duh.**

**OOOOOHHHH... The disclaimer. Thanks Dino!**

**Dino: Bleh**

**I think he needs help. I DO NOT OWN PJO! Or do I? Kidding, I don't. This is a looooooong Authors Note. And... END.**

* * *

**Chapter... Ummm... Six?**

** Chaos Agent P.O.V**

"Okay. You need to go back to Earth. That is an order, understand? And try not to kill anyone." Chaos finished, glaring.

"Meh. Okay." I replied. Chaos turned to stare at me.

"Wait... Who the hell are you?"

"I'm Derek." Chaos' face still looked blank. "The janitor."

"Oooohhhhh... You're a slave!"

"Well no, not r-"

"Silence slave! Now go make me a sandwich!"

"Yes mummy."

* * *

CAMP HALF BLOOD. 0800 HOURS. I TALK MILITARY NOW!

"Campers!" Chiron's voice carried easily over the throng of half bloods. "The top secret assassin should be arriving soon." Suddenly, a dark spot appeared in the sky above them. Campers started to point as the spot grew larger, before the pod slammed into the ground. The door opened out with a hiss of hydraulics, ands campers craned their necks in a vain attempt to see into the darkness inside the pod. Suddenly, an ear splitting scream was heard. Campers looked around in shock as the screaming grew louder and more agitated, before a dark shape slammed into the ground beside the pod.

"Always the face." The figure complained as he stood up. He looked over and sneered. "Campe- OOOWWW!" The last part was lost as he once again somehow managed to faceplant from standing still in one place. He sneered again.

"Campers."

"Percy?"

"DAMNIT!"


End file.
